Daly Dose Debuts!
Dipping the toes in the water…
Welcome to the Daly Dose. I have no idea what this will become or what I want it to be. I want to talk about Hockey. I want to talk about Football and my love for Luton Town FC. I want to talk about Music, something that’s been around my life since I was born. I want to talk about anything and everything. Most importantly though I just want a place to talk. I know not all my ramblings are going to be for everyone and I can promise you will disagree with 99.9% of my thoughts, we are all different and unique.
I was going to start with a recap of the NHL Trade Deadline which closed today (Friday) but decided instead to go a more personal route. I write because it gives me an outlet but I haven’t done it a lot in the last year. 2022 was not a good year and when I needed it most I could never find the right words. I know now writing anything is better than nothing, but for a while there I didn’t know if I’d ever write again. This will be the first time I’ll share with most about the ordeal of 2022 and how 2023 hasn’t started with the right mojo, but to understand it brings me back to 2009.
That was the year I emigrated from Ireland to the west coast of America to start my life with my beautiful wife. I was in my late twenties but looking back now still extremely cocky and immature. I thought it’d be a piece of cake but homesickness hit hard and even going on 14 years later never gets easier. My biggest fear was always something happening to my family and not being able to get home in time. How would I react?
Well, last year I found out when I got the late-night phone call that my Mom had taken a stroke. I’m close to both my parents but to say I’m a momma’s boy would not be an understatement. I broke down. I couldn’t even think straight and if it wasn’t for my wife I don’t think I would have been capable of organizing a way home to Ireland. It was a pretty severe stroke that was touch and go for a while leaving her needing care for the rest of her days.
After much jumping through hoops (passports had expired) I, along with my family, was able to get home, hold her hand and tell her I loved her. She also got to see her grandson who she adores. While it was obvious the stroke had a damaging effect watching her eyes light up when she saw him was enough to let me know the mom I knew was still in there fighting through all this.
After three weeks and much deliberation with the family we left Ireland to head back to the west coast understanding my brother had a handle on things and would ask should it ever feel like he needed help. There’s been good days and bad days but we help each other through both and have wives who we can lean on.
I got back and threw myself into work to take my mind off things. It was easy with a district visit coming up. I had been with the company for 10 years and although every job has bad days I enjoyed working there. It was during this visit that I realized I needed to leave when a district team member asked me about a lack of communication with my team over the past month. I was stunned into silence. They were known as a bully but this seemed cruel even for them. While one member of the district team preached work-life balance this person made it known that extra, long hours were expected. At that point, I knew I wouldn’t be there much longer. In November I quit.
While all this was going on my wife was dealing with a tumor that thankfully had been diagnosed as benign but still needed to be removed and my new permanent resident card was taking forever to arrive. Watching my wife, my rock, go through that and realizing just how much she does for me on a daily basis as she recuperated opened my eyes to a lot of things in relation to work life balance. The delay on the permanent residence card didn’t help either as it meant I couldn’t get back to Ireland easily if need be or at one point seek alternative employment.
Everything was getting too much and I began drinking more than usual. I always hear it numbs the pain but it didn’t for me. It just pushed it all to the forefront but somehow I felt better after letting it all out so I’d do it again. It wasn’t healthy.
The drink also helped after getting hit on my bike, damaging my ankle to the point I could barely walk on it. My fear of doctors meant I never really knew the full extent of the damage, but the alcohol made it hurt less after a day on my feet. 2022 couldn’t end quickly enough with the only thing worth celebrating being the Colorado Avalanche lifting the Stanley Cup. Even that, while enjoyable, was muted.
2023 hasn’t exactly started fantastically with my elderly father, living alone for the first time in his life, awaiting some medical results. Luckily my parents have a community of friends and neighbors that have made it their mission to take care of him. It doesn’t make it easier though, being this far away, but knowing they have good people around them helps me cope. There are good days and bad days. On the good days, you try to enjoy as much of life as possible with the people you love. During the bad days, you lean on those people who have helped the most to pull you through.
Outside my family, there were a lot of people who lent support but two, in particular, stand out. Funnily enough, I’ve never met either person in real life and grew close through online communities. I won’t mention their names but I’m sure they know who they are and hope they know how extremely grateful I am for all their help whether it was just listening to me ramble or providing sound advice from a place of knowledge and understanding.
As I said I don’t know what this blog will be but hopefully it won’t be always this heavy. Let’s resume our regularly scheduled programming by slandering Chris MacFarland for not making any big trades. Time to blow it up in Colorado and be ‘Bad for Bedard’. The way the past few years are going I shouldn’t be giving 2023 any ideas.